I have learned that out of all of that struggle, frustration,
waiting and waiting and waiting,
pushing and pulling for change,
trying to take one step forward to fall two steps backwards,
repeatedly making a list of whys and ways of giving up,
constantly questioning HOW DID I GET HERE?
The ground was being tilled and seeds were being planted.
I have learned that out of all of that pain, longsuffering,
closed doors, brokeness,
weeping and weeping and weeping,
wiping my face just to weep again.
flooding the floor with tears,
wiping them up with my body as I lay prostrate,
begging and pleading for mercy.
The seeds were being watered
I have learned that out of all that shame, self condemnation,
praying and praying and praying and praying and praying,
There were moments of feeling cursed, unheard and abandoned.
I thought I was alone, hmmm I THOUGHT I was alone.
you see I was reaching for something, anything that would ease the pain.
I was hearing stories about winds of blessings and favor happening around the corner,
hoping that it would blow through my street and land on my doorstep,
wondering if I was next.
I was feeling that the line was moving
but I wasn’t getting any closer to my destiny or was I?
The sun was shining though I could not see.
The rays were penetrating through what I thought was problems,
but God saw it as opportunities
and all things, all things worked together for the good for me.
I was being rooted in love and grounded in humility.
a solid, firm foundation was being formed
and God was preparing a table for me
in the face of all of them that laughed, ridiculed
and thought that I was crazy to wait patiently.
I knew, I just knew He was leading me down this path to lead me to victory.
Cause in the kingdom of God there are NO DEAD END STREETS.
I did’nt know that I was being developed properly
Then one day, one day in perfect timing
he pulled me out of that horrible pit and miry clay and set my feet upon a rock.
There was a shift,
a change in my visibility,
I can now see that through all of that
I stood with my foot firm into the foundation
built on my personal experience with God
who showed Himself to be my everything.
I have learned to except and appreciate my process.
Those steps were ordered just for me.
I don’t take for granted the life that I have lived or the air that I breathe.
I don’t take for granted all of that HARD UNDERGROUND WORK it took for me to bud in my season.
you’ve heard the saying “when it rains it pours”.
I say when He reigns He pours
an overflow of blessings,
abundance of joy and peace.
eventually all will see the purpose of your pain.
He will show you that your struggles were never meant to be in vain.
and in time He will cause you to sprout and stand beautifully,
uncovered with the dirt under your feet
as the unique individual he created you to be.
showing you to be more than just a seed.
I have learned that out of all of that tragedy
came life and that more abundantly
